Cubs

Baffoe: Analyzing The Potential Cubs Analysts

Wrigley Field.  (Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images)

Wrigley Field. (Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images)

Tim Baffoe - clean background Tim Baffoe
Tim Baffoe attended the University of Iowa before earning his de...
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By Tim Baffoe-

(CBS) The search for a Cubs TV color analyst seems to be down to five men. And in typical Cub fashion not a one of the names is terribly exciting.

But that may be okay. I’d be lying if I said the hiring of some Kermit the Frog impressionist and a guy who was in the Cubs booth before I was cognizant of good broadcasting and who won a World Series managing a different team had me terribly excited in 2004. But Len Kasper and Bob Brenly grew to be the best broadcast team—TV or radio—for any sports team in this city. Knowing how solid on play-by-play Kasper already is, coupled with from all reports being an affable chap and pretty easy to get along and work with, assuming that the pick of the five candidates to replace the great Brenly will automatically be bad might be a bit falsely presumptuous.

So how does each of the five possible booth-fillers stack up? Here’s the good, the bad, and the ugly on each supposed candidate.

Dan Plesac

Good: Considered by many to be the favorite, the former Cubs pre- and postgame studio host for Comcast Sports Net certainly is familiar with the broadcasting environment round these parts. His recent work with MLB Network makes him the alpha dog among the five as far as resumes go. Smart baseball guy who has shown a wry sense of humor, something understatedly crucial to the modern Cubs booth (both because Kasper shares it and if you can’t laugh while doing Cubs games, you’ll never make it out alive).

Bad: He’s a native of Indiana. He’s a former Cub. He’s not much of a sabermetric guy, and anyone who watches Cubs games knows what a New Schooler Kasper is. MLB Network also recently signed him to a new deal, so things get sticky there.

Ugly: He may be physically attracted to pandas.

Rick Sutcliffe

Good: Good chance he could broadcast drunk. Will be comfortable during the seven times a year Bill Murray wanders into the booth. Likes hot chicks more than cancer.

Bad: He’s a former Cub. He no likey the hard math stuff neither. Like Plesac, Sutcliffe is amid a contract to broadcast elsewhere. Also, he’s a Ginger.

Ugly: Good chance he could broadcast drunk.

Eric Karros

Good: Far and away the best hair of any candidate. Usually.  Not liked by A.J. Pierzynski.

Bad: He’s a former Cub. He cray.

Ugly: His hair is wanted for war crimes in several countries.

Todd Hollandsworth

Good: Currently what Plesac used to be. Kasper knows him well. He’s not afraid to go hard on a guy.

Bad: He’s a former Cub. He named his kid Tugg.

Ugly: Whoa.

Gary Matthews

Good: The Slide-Piece. Only candidate to be on a soft drink can.

Bad: Used to work as a Blue Jays analyst, so he likely has an annoying Canadian accent. He’s a former Cub. His son is a former Cub. Matthews is also probably friends with Keith Moreland.

Ugly: By many accounts, he’s bad at the job.

So there are your candidates, Cubs fans. If the list doesn’t please you, at least appreciate that the broadcast team in 2013 will not be Chip Caray and Joe Carter.

tim baffoe small Baffoe: Analyzing The Potential Cubs Analysts

Tim Baffoe

Tim Baffoe attended the University of Iowa and Governors State University and began blogging at The Score after winning the 2011 Pepsi Max Score Search. He enjoys writing things about stuff, but not so much stuff about things. When not writing for 670TheScore.com, Tim corrupts America’s youth as a high school English teacher and provides a great service to his South Side community delivering pizzas (please tip him and his colleagues well). You can follow Tim’s inappropriate brain droppings on Twitter @Ten_Foot_Midget , but please don’t follow him in real life. He grew up in Chicago’s Beverly To read more of Tim’s blogs click here.