Chicago Anti-Valentine’s Day Guide

February 10, 2011 7:04 AM

Alliance Bakery


Being single at this time of year can be especially stressful, as images of hearts and roses abound and the landscape becomes an increasingly crimson reminder of singlehood. Enduring Valentine’s Day without a sweetie can be rough, but it’s also an opportunity for singles to get together and alleviate the sting of Cupid’s poison arrow by getting down with their bad selves. Some area venues are thankfully reversing the typical Valentine’s themes and putting on events for the dateless, and it’s also a great time to crank up “Love Stinks” on the stereo and invite your single friends over for an Anti-Valentine’s bash. All the single ladies (and guys), here’s a guide to help celebrate the holiday your way.

Alliance Bakery


Anti-Valentine’s Cookies from Alliance Bakery

Valentine’s Day is always accompanied by a barrage of holiday-related sweets, invariably of a sugary red heart-shaped variety. Wicker Park’s Alliance Bakery takes the contrarian approach with their cookie creations adorned with messages such as “I love me,” “It’s not me, it’s you,” and “Stop calling me.” Pick up a dozen of these brilliant goodies for your party, or for a certain ex-special someone.

Alliance Bakery
1736 W. Division St.
Chicago, IL 60622
(773) 278-0366

Lincoln Hall


Anti-Valentine’s Day Party: Twisted Tales of Dating in the Windy City

Hearing true stories of others’ love lives can have the comforting effect of making your own tales of woe seem harmless in comparison. Lincoln Hall is hosting an event featuring performances of stories of love and dating in Chicago by 2nd Story, with live music by My Gold Mask on Monday, February 14. The evening’s signature cocktail Punch Drunk Love will be on special from 9:00-11:00 p.m.

Lincoln Hall
2424 N Lincoln Ave
Chicago, IL 60614
(773) 525-2501

Half Fast


Half Fast’s Burning Love Party

If ‘50s retro, tattoos and motorcycles are your thing, join your fellow rock & roll singles at The Abbey for the 4th Annual “Burning Love” party on Saturday, February 12. The anti-Valentine’s Day celebration of the Chicago-based Half Fast motorcycle social club will benefit the Helping Hannah’s Heart charity and feature a live set by Deal’s Gone Bad.

The Abbey
3420 W. Grace St.
Chicago, IL 60618
(773) 478-4408

Howl At Moon


Luv Sux at Howl at the Moon

River North’s Howl at the Moon puts a wicked pin on its dueling pianos show at their annual Luv Sux party on Saturday, February 12. Sip on the X-Boyfriend cocktail or and 86-ounce Hex Your Ex Bucket of Booze and take part in a variety of games, contests and special offers. Bring along a mutilated picture of your Ex for half off cover.

Howl at the Moon
26 W. Hubbard St.
Chicago, IL 60654
(312) 863-7427




Letters/X is billed as “Chicago’s original anti-Valentine’s Day cabaret.” The show is based entirely on letters, texts, emails, phone messages, etc. submitted by the public, detailing break-ups, make-ups and various hilarious disasters of couplehood. The Apollo Theatre Studio will host performances Thursday-Saturday (with a special Valentine’s Day performance on Monday, February 14) from February 10 through March 12.

Apollo Theatre
2540 N. Lincoln Ave.
Chicago, IL 60614
(773) 935-6100

Screw Cupid Pub Crawl

Bar 1 Events will conduct its 12th annual “Screw Cupid Pub Crawl” on Saturday, February 12. Drop a tear in your beer or celebrate your freedom with a roving gang of lovelorn Anti-Valentines. Trolleys will run to McGee’s, Wrightwood Tap, Durkin’s, Duffy’s, Redmond’s and Maeve. The $25 meal package includes buffets, domestic drafts and “Love Punch” at each participating bar from 8:00-11:00 p.m.

Various locations
Bar 1 Events
Chicago, IL
(773) 868-8073


Greg Wahl is a Chicagoan, a freelancer, a grad student, and a seeker of all things awesome & interesting throughout the city and beyond.

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