Horrible Horoscope: Sagittarius
By Mason Johnson
Warning: If you love astrology, are offended easily, or/and have no sense of humor, this might make you gassy (and angry).
Sagittarius
Do you ever get the feeling someone is watching you, Sagittarius?
In our technologically advanced society, the stars want you to know we're always being watched. Even the sanctity of your bathroom could one day be forsaken. This isn't a big deal, it's manageable, so don't worry!
All you have to do is be perfect all the time.
Can you manage that, Sag?
While I know it'll be hard to give up your bad booger-eating habit, think of how embarrassing it'd be to have a photo of yourself with your finger firmly planted up your nose.
So clean up your act, Sagittarius, before you embarrass yourself.
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Mason Johnson knows absolutely nothing about astrology and is probably watching you RIGHT NOW.