Horrible Horoscopes: Leo

By Mason Johnson

Warning: If you love astrology, are offended easily, or/and have no sense of humor, this might make you gassy (and angry). Not your sign? Find more Horrible Horoscopes here.

Leo

Leo, I get it, you're evil. The stars don't want to change you – keep on being you! If you want to mistreat everyone around you, why should the stars say otherwise?

They suggest a bit of transparency though. In the future, they suggest that you own up to the evil things you do.

So when you cut the hours of your employees to save a few bucks (who doesn't want more money by making people suffer?), don't try to make your evil actions political by blaming the president's healthcare bill. Just own up to it! How hard is it to say, "Hey, I'm greedy, and I'm lovin' it"?

You don't see vampire mastermind (and fellow Leo) Spike making lame excuses, do you? No way, he's like, "Yeah, I'm awesome, I'm evil, deal with it."

No, you're not as cool as Spike, but maybe you can learn a thing or two from him.

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Mason Johnson knows absolutely nothing about astrology and loves Wendy's despite this horoscope.