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Downstate Men Denied Civil Union Accommodations

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Mark And Todd Wathen

Mark (left) and Todd Wathen were denied service at two downstate bed-and-breakfasts for their planned civil union. (Credit: The Wathens)

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MATTOON, Ill. (STMW) – When civil unions were legalized in Illinois, a pair of downstate men started planning their future, but when they tried to rent a hall for the celebration, they learned discrimination does not end with a stroke of the governor’s pen.

Now the Illinois Attorney General’s office is investigating after two bed and breakfasts refused to rent them space for a ceremony and reception, including one in the Kankakee area.

One owner explained he only hosted “traditional weddings” and not civil unions, while the other was more emphatic, telling the men homosexual unions were “wrong” and citing Bible verses to justify his opinion.

Todd Wathen of Mattoon and his partner, Mark Wathen, both in their mid-40s, have been together for about eight years.

Following passage of the Illinois Religious Freedom Protection and Civil Unions Act, which takes effect in June, they planned for a civil union ceremony later that month.

A couple of days after Gov. Pat Quinn signed the bill on Jan. 31, the Wathens contacted the Beall Manison in Alton and the TimberCreek B&B in Paxton, about 50 miles south of Kankakee, to book a venue for a ceremony and reception.

But in an e-mail reply from the Beall Mansion, Todd Wathen was told, “At this point we will just be doing traditional weddings.”

Beall’s definition of traditional weddings: “Weddings as opposed to civil unions.”

The inn later e-mailed back to say they did not host civil union ceremonies or receptions for either same-sex or heterosexual couples, “nor do we do many other types of events.”

Its website, however, boasts “elegant accommodations for pleasure or business, weddings and receptions … corporate retreats … anniversary parties, fund-raising events, bridal and baby showers.”

While the Beall treid to avoid the issue, Timber Creek was more emphatic in its denial.

In an e-mail reply to Todd Wathen, Jim A. Walder of the TimberCreek Bed & Breakfast wrote: “We will never host same-sex civil unions. We will never host same-sex weddings even if they become legal in Illinois.

“We believe homosexuality is wrong and unnatural based on what the Bible says about it. If that is discrimination, I guess we unfortunately discriminate,” Walder wrote.

When informed of the new law, Walder replied, “The Bible does not state opinions, but facts. It contains the highest laws pertinent to man. It trumps Illinois law, United States law, and global law should there ever be any.”

Three days later on Feb. 18, Walder sent an unsolicited e-mail to Todd Wathen that included links to Bible passages. He wrote, “Hi Todd, I know you may not want to hear this, but I thought I would send along a couple of verses in Romans 1 detailing how the Creator of the Universe looks at the gay lifestyle. It’s not too late to change your behavior.”

Todd Wathen said he was taken aback by the response from both inns.

“If they’d just sent the e-mail back and said, ‘Hey, I’m uncomfortable with this,’ or ‘I wouldn’t be the best (place) for this, but I wish you luck’,” the couple wouldn’t have minded being turned down.

But, “They don’t have a right to talk to us like that,” he said.

Todd and Mark Wathen are being represented by Chicago attorney Betty Tsamis.

They filed complaints with the Illinois Attorney General’s office and the Dept. of Human Rights alleging violations of the Illinois Human Rights Act, which prohibits discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation by businesses open to the public, Tsamis said.

“The attorney general’s office has started its investigation,” she said. “The AG’s office gets involved when there is a pattern and practice that adversely affects a large group of protected people (in this case, gays and lesbians).”

The attorney general’s office is “reviewing the case to determine if these individuals may have been discriminated against over their sexual orientation,” spokeswoman Robyn Ziegler said. “If so, that would be a violation of the state’s civil rights law.”

TimberCreek and Beall Mansion did not immediately respond to requests for comment.

Though they had a commitment ceremony about eight years ago, “This is what we’ve been waiting for — to have the same rights and benefits as a married couple,” Todd Wathen said.

“It seems the only place accepting of this is Chicago,” but the couple doesn’t want to make their family members travel to Chicago, and “we shouldn’t have to go through the whole state of Illinois” to find a place that would be willing to host the ceremony.

Todd and Mark chose the two particular inns because they are natives of southern Indiana and northern Kentucky and it would be easier for family members to drive to Alton or Paxton then to Chicago, Todd Wathen said Tuesday.

He said for most family members, a trip to Chicago would be six or seven hours, whereas “we’re not too far at all from Timber Creek,” and Alton is easily accessible to family from Missouri, Indiana and Kentucky because it is not far from I-64.

“I’m trying to plan a wedding, just like anybody else would,” he said. “Both of these places offer wedding and reception areas.”

“We don’t want to go to the clerk’s office and get it done by a Justice of the Peace,” he said. “We want a place to remember.”

Todd Wathen said he and Mark are continuing to look for a venue will be willing to host their celebration, but “I’m almost at the point where I’m scared of contacting anybody else. I don’t want those (kind of) responses.”

(Source: Sun-Times Media Wire © Chicago Sun-Times 2011. All Rights Reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.)

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  • HeorShe

    Isn’t it sad that a grown man in his mid-40′s has to be anonymous about who he is? Isn’t it also sad that there are people out there who believe that the bible trumps the law?

    Todd . . . maybe it’s time to move to a bigger city where you can be who you are without the need for anonymity or the level of oppression you and your partner are experiencing. It’s hard enough to be gay; consider being gay where you’re welcome! Have the wedding in the backyard of one of your relatives. The people who attend are more important than the location of the event. Have a lovely day, make some great memories, and then get yourselves out of podunk Mattoon and up to Chicago or down to St Louis. “It gets better.”

    • Mr. Justice

      Obviously you are a freaking moron. If someone owns a business, adheres to the Bible for their moral compass, they have a right to rent space to whomever they want. This is American you idiot! What’s your moral compass? Do you even have one? I doubt it. The next time you feel like spewing your verbal vomit, look me up you punk!

  • bob

    it is more sad that a gown man can’t be man enough to admit his orientation. And what lousy advice. Bigger cities only allow them to hide easier, but they are still isolated within there own communities, as they should be, by the way.

  • Amelie

    Sad that in this day and age there are still people who say the bible is ‘fact’. I may be straight, but I think this is outrageous and I wish Todd and his partner all the best.

  • lms

    I do believe that the Bible is true and factual, in as far as it is translated. In accordance with this, The Bible and Christ himself admonished us not to judge anyone else. Also, we are told that we must embrace and “love thy neighbor” regardless if we agree or disagree with thier opinions or practices. These people, who quote scripture so freely, need to remember these most important principles of the Christian faith. It is ironic that our Savior’s parents were turned away from the inns in just as an important time in thier lives as well.

  • bonesy

    It should be well within a buisnesses right to refuse service to anyone. I also consider my self a born again person, yes we are not to judge others for their wrongdoings but it doesnt say we are to allow them or help them sin. I would hope that both these places fight the law and I hope they win.

    • Mr. Justice

      Good answers. Glad there i someone on here with some balls to stand up to these puking liberals!

  • Tbru

    So would they host a second wedding for two previously married people? Do they serve meat on Fridays or close up shop on The Sabbath? Always interesting when Bibleists pick and choose their spots.

    Maybe the economy is improving when businesses can turn down revenue.

    • Mr. Justice

      It’s their business! What about that don’t you get idiot! If they don’t want to rent to gay people, that is their choice.

  • leo75

    I agree with the other posters who suggested having the wedding at a family member’s house or biting the bullet and traveling to Chicago for the ceremony. I hate to stereotype but small town USA is very different from the big city. I wouldn’t live in a small town for all the tea in China! I’m not saying everyone in a small town is against the gay lifestyle but the majority of people in a small town would not accept this lifestyle. I wish these two men well. I hope they can find a place to accomodate them. We all have a right to be happy!!

  • http://completeweddingwebsite.com/latest-wedding-planning-book-news-2 Latest Wedding Planning Book News | Complete Wedding Website

    [...] Downstate Adult males Denied Civil Union Accommodations When a pair of downstate males tried to rent a hall for their civil union celebration, they realized discrimination does not finish with a stroke of the governor’s pen. Study much more on CBS Chicago [...]

  • DEREK DOWNS

    FOR YOUR INFORMATION….. ITS NOT THE BUSINESS’ CHOICE TO REFUSE SERVICE TO ANYONE BSED ON THEIR SEXUAL ORIENTATION. THEY CAN HOWEVER REFUSE SERVICE DUE TO PRIOR ISSUES WITH THE SAID PERSON. THE INN OWNERS SHOULD BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR THEIR SLANDEROUS ACCUSATIONS AND BE FINED FOR THIS! I JUST LOVE HOW EVERYONE SEEMS TO QUOTE THE BIBLE AND ITS VERSES YET DOESNT QUOTE THE PARTS LIKE…… “THOU SHALT NOT JUDGE” ONLY SEEM TO SCAVANGE FOR THE VERSES WHERE ANY GAY MEANING WAS LOOKED DOWN UPON! I HOPE AND PRAY TO GOD THESE 2 MEN CAN FIND A PLACE CLOSE TO THEM TO HOLD THIS CEREMONY SO THEY CAN LIVE HAPPILY TOGETHER WITHOUT DISCRIMINATION BECAUSE I DONT BELIEVE IN A GOD CONDEMNING SOMEONE FOR LOVING WHO THEY LOVE!

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