By Dan Bernstein–
670TheScore.com senior columnist
(670 The Score) Please, please let this happen. And here I thought the league-wide extension of protective netting was something to get all excited about, not even realizing that MLB and its players are considering something even greater.
As a way to help speed up games, we may see a return of the specialized golf carts once used to shuttle relief pitchers from the bullpens to the mound. Reports surfaced Thursday evening that the pace-of-play negotiations over pitch clocks and mound visits also included real consideration of bringing back the ’70s relics that some young fans barely believe were real.
I know this, because I had to explain a certain scene in the third act of “Major League” to a kid who had no idea why it was funny.
This is a surprising and wonderful twist to a tedious debate, and I have no clue as to its actual effect on the issue at hand, but I don’t care. They’re golf carts with big stupid baseball hats on them or full-size cars or in the case of the Mariners, a boat on wheels. And they’re rediscovered inventory for ad sales.
You think the sausage race and running of the presidents are fun? How about it’s the top of the seventh at Wrigley, Joe Madddon signals for Carl Edwards, and three enclosed carts drive toward the mound — but only one of them will disgorge the reliever, and you’d better have the right number on your ticket stub to win a free drive-thru taco!
I’m just spitballing here. I’m excited. Stay with me.
The possibilities are endless, including motorcycle dealerships, moving companies or even the funeral home that once sponsored the black Cadillac hearse that did the job for opponents at Comiskey Park in the ’50s. The area around Wrigley is teeming with bicycle rickshaws who could vie for the rights or try to beat the clock.
Whatever it ends up, just make it be. It’s an unexpected idea quite literally out of left field.