(CBS) As he does every year, Deadpin’s Drew Magary explains why each NFL team sucks.

It doesn’t matter if your team won the Super Bowl the previous season, Magary is coming for them.

Today, the columnist released Why Your Team Sucks 2013: Chicago Bears. 

Here are a few of the reasons listed by Magary:

“Trestman hasn’t been in the NFL for seven years. His last stint was as an assistant on a Tampa team that went 4-12. You never want to make a coaching hire that Al Davis plausibly could have made.”

“The Bears now face the dilemma of either grossly overpaying for a guy who, on an annual basis, turns the ball over about as often as he throws for a touchdown, or letting Jay Cutler walk and starting all over again. If you’re familiar with this team’s history of quarterbacking, you know what a terrifying prospect that is.”

“And now Brian Urlacher is gone. URRRRRRLAYYYYYKURRRRRR. That means that Bears fans have lost their one, limp emotional connection to the franchise.”

Check out the full column here! 

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